Toons Together - Introduction
by SpongeFan257
Summary: Seems like animated reality's got an all-star cast! Join some of your favorite characters as they star in this Drawn Together parody. A clash of different characters...what sort of trouble could possibly happen here? This story is for the PROLOGUE. Minor use of language but foul enough for an M rating, so be warned for future related content for this series! Read and Review!
1. Introduction

The SpongeSons Guy Drawn Together – Introduction

_**Greetings. It's SpongeFan257, with a new story, featuring a different type of show. The new SpongeFan257 Show for the collection is Drawn Together, and that's got to be the most rude, yet hysterical-to-watch program I've ever seen. This piece is an introduction to my new parody of that show. It's not quite done, as I'm working on a prologue (how they got into the house, but not including the cast greeting each other. That's for another time.). There will be series published as a single story, with an episode in each chapter. If you're one to not like or can't take racism and sexism jokes then turn away. Even this single chapter has it's minority. (Not mentioned but remember that Foxxy is black and Ling-Ling was Asian and were racist stereotypes a such on the actual show, which I am loosely following) Also included would be gay bashing, constant use of the word 'retard', references to cutting, fat jokes, and such. If you seriously would take offense just turn away and we're all happy here.**_

_**I would like to add that I've made the story less adult-themed than the actual Drawn Together show, but it's still M because it is Drawn Together (and Family Guy). SpongeBob characters won't swear but will have their share of this kind of less kid-friendly humor. May all under 18's that love SpongeBob please turn away if you want. Being a big fan myself (the difference being that I can take a jab at my fav cartoon star, but I don't know about you.)**__**I was inspired because there isn't much Drawn Together on Fanfiction. I know it's a rude show, but come on! I myself am not racist or sexist, but I can laugh at the humor they portray. I first knew the show via Clara, where I found out that she was like a Disney Princess, I later found out about this as well as Wooldoor as a SpongeBob parody.**_

_**Anyway, on with it. Some of the chapter is directly taken from the (scrapped) extended version of the character intros in Drawn Together. **_

* * *

_This is the SpongeFan257 House. Fourteen cartoon characters across the single world of unique cartoon character, with some being retarded fakes while others being the real deal, will live together while in front of a million cameras, because their lives didn't suck enough in their own worlds._

_Introducing SpongeBob SquarePants, a funny yellow fry cook thing that can clean as good as he cooks._

"I'm ready to do anything!"

_Patrick Star, SpongeBob's ultimately retarded friend and sidekick, who thinks mayonnaise is an instrument and a tamborine goes on a sandwich._

"What a lovely day! Well, time to go sleep some more."

_Bart Simpson, the ten year old mischief maker who doesn't know when to stop and go when it comes to his pranks._

"I'm Bart Simpson, where the hell am I going? Answer me or eat my shorts!"

_Lisa Simpson, Bart's annoying smart-ass sister who trys and gets her fat mouth in any conversation._

"I hope everyone I meet will be nice at the house."

_Stewie Griffin, the remarkably intelligent one year old baby with access to a variety of kickass weaponry._

"Prepare for the fun to come along, my dear housemates."

_Brian Griffin, the Griffin family who's coming to be a part of the show and to babysit Stewie._

"Whose leg do I have to hump to get a dry martini around the house?"

_Princess Clara, the fairytale princess who turns out to be a real bitch when she opens her mouth._

"Oh, I do wish to see the world beyond the castle, and away from all the poor common folk."

_Wooldoor Sockbat, the goddamn annoying whacky whatchimacallit who manages to keep out of trouble, despite being a retard._

"I'm great to be with… everyone in town knows that! I'm sure I'll be as 'irritating' as I was here!"

_Foxxy Love, a double threat to society being a musician who can solve mysteries… and has a cute ass._

"Foxxy gonna show y'all how ta have a great time!"

_Spanky Ham, a perverted internet download who is poorly created and craps on retards._

"Oh yeah! Let's show these TV hoes how great an internet pig can be!"

_Xandir P. WhiffleBottom, a totally gay video game adventurer complete with matching outfits and special moves._

"I'm on a quest to save my girlfriend. She may be ungrateful but she is still my girlfriend!"

_Ling-Ling, a homicidal Asian battle monster who speaks the ancient made-up-by-Asians language of Engrish._

_Toot Braunstein, an old black-and-white sex symbol from the twenties… but she's a fatass._

"He he he! I'm sure that my bulky figure will never go out of style, reducing us all to skinny stumps."

_And Captain Hero, another person in the house._

_Together, they are… 'The SpongeSons Guy Drawn Together', or the much better 'Toons Together Gang"!_

* * *

**_Not much offense, but just a reminder. If you feel like you'll get insulted, don't read Series 1, which I'll be starting after I finish the next chapter of this. I'll also be making a pirate-themed cartoon crossover, featuring tons of stars._**


	2. Prologue

It was a typically cold summer evening in the Tooniverse. All the toon characters had finished their filming for the day and were trying to get home, cars bustling on the roads as the countless rows of vehicles seemed endless and permanent. Only a few were smart enough to avoid this delay, as a light gleamed in the TV studio in the town center, and was no doubt the tallest building in that area.

The light came from the top floor, where two toons remained. One was a crab wearing formal business attire while the other was a man in a suit, but had a camera for a head unlike most human characters found in town.

The crab was looking over a new script, given to him by the other man, "Aye…this is just…" he sighed, sweating rapidly as he dared himself to read on.

"Is there something wrong, Mr. Krabs?" the literal cameraman asked, "Did I catch you at a bad time?"

Krabs huffed, "You made it a bad time, Jew Producer! Just look at this script!" he shoved the thick wad of paper into his lens.

The Jew Producer lazily examined the paper, having already got knowledge of his own script, "Yeah…what's wrong with it?"

"What's wrong with it?" Krabs stealthily pounced on the cameraman, "It's absolute bullcrap garbage!"

"It's not that shitty," the Jew Producer claimed as he tried to push himself out of the crab's grasp, with little-to-no success.

"You wipe your ass on paper to get this stuff?"

The Jew Producer exclaimed in retaliation, "What the hell am I doing wrong, then?"

"You're ruining the station's reputation, that's what!" Krabs fumed, "And how dare you talk back to me! How dare you even get the guts to show me this filth!"

"But I'm sure if…" The Jew Producer tried to intervene but was immediately cut off by his boss.

"These eight characters are a disgrace to the face of television! A racist princess, a retarded superhero parody…what kind of creepypastas do you sleep with?" Krabs then went back over to his desk and spoke into a microphone, which was connected to the reception outside, "Please send him in."

"Yes, sir." Came the response on the other end.

The Jew Producer stared at his boss in confusion, "Um, "him", sir?"

"Let me say this," Krabs began, readjusting himself in his chair, "I'll give you a chance with this script. It's a promising concept, and it's not like we don't accept adult-orientated television shows to be a part of the studio. But a few tweaks are gonna have to be made to that shit in order to me to even dare let you begin your first episode. And by 'a few', I mean-"

"-a lot." The Jew Producer interrupted dully, "Yeah, yeah, I get it…"

Mr. Krabs was about to retort, but someone stepped slowly into the room. He was a young man, probably not even eighteen at that, but quite tall enough to give that impression, and also made his way inside the room in a carefully organized and nervous manner. His hand still stayed on the door handle, "You, uh, you wanted to see me, sir?"

"Yes," Krabs smiled in what seemed like the first time in a long while, "Please, have a seat, my dear boy."

The young man sat down, not wasting any time to make sure he didn't overstay his welcome. The Jew Producer also reluctantly sat down as a response (and from a threatening glare reserved only for him)

"Jew Producer, this is Kieran. He's a young lad who's learnin' about how to write creative things, and having seen what he's capable of, I've decided to take him under my wing and help him get more into being creative."

Kieran blushed lightly in embarrassment at the comments while the Jew Producer huffed, "Cute story, but that's my problem…how, exactly?"

"Given your work is in need of a complete refresh, it's quite obvious you need help from those who have had even less experience in the industry than you have." The crab let out a snort of disgust at the cameraman, before turning to Kieran with a smile, "And that's where you come in. I want you to help this guy boost his show to the best you can in order to make me a profit."

The boy grinned, "Well, that sounds divine, sir! I'll be sure to try my best!"

Krabs cleared his throat upon grabbing the script from the desk, "Well, here's the prototype script you've got as a base."

Kieran read the script carefully, yet quite swiftly, not spending more than ten seconds on a page. With every few pages his face would gain more expressions of disgust and confusion. He barely finished the script, throwing it out of his hands and at the Jew Producer, "Holy fuck! This script is just plain nasty!"

"Indeed it is." Krabs coughed slightly, most likely due to feeling the same way.

"I couldn't help but notice there was no name. At all. On any page. Do you know what it is?"

"No, and it's clear the producer doesn't either," Krabs scoffed, "But that's part of what you'll have to do."

"Well, okay then, I guess?" Kieran shrugged, "As there's two of us working on the script I'd say we won't make too much of a mess with it."

"Do what you must." Krabs informed, "But remember, Jew Producer, this is your last chance. Mess this up and you're outta here!"

The Jew Producer gulped, "Y-yes, sir…"

He then proceeded to exit the room, shaking. Kieran sighed with impatience as he gripped the cameraman's suit and pulled him along.

* * *

Soon later, Kieran and the Jew Producer arrived at a large house. It was the house they intended to use for the show, as well as using the area as a temporary workplace to redraft some of the fail scripts flaws (so pretty much the whole thing).

"Is this the place?" Kieran asked as he got out of the Jew Producer's car, script in hand. He stared at the house with awe. It was of a bright yellow that still managed to shine even at night. He had winced upon seeing it, but soon his eyes had gotten accustomed to the sight.

"Sure is." The Jew Producer answered.

Kieran nodded, "Hm. Looks pretty nice!"

The Jew Producer beamed at his first compliment for the day, "Really?"

"Sure. But seriously dim the color of this house down. I'll not be held responsible for giving our characters epilepsy or some shit."

"So…use a darker yellow?"

Kieran slammed the car door shut, "Yes, if possible. But maybe consider a nice shade of blue? Or hey, let's make it an orangy-brown color!"

"Jesus Christ…" the Jew Producer exclaimed as his fellow companion carried on about what color the house should be.

Kieran snapped his fingers at the cameraman's face before making his way in, "Bloody hell, am I gonna have to deal with you not listening to me on this?" He held the front door open with his foot, looking back at his companion and raising his voice, "Now get in!"

Feeling slightly intimidated by the boy's way of address, the Jew Producer swiftly entered the house, turned the lights on and sat on the couch nearby, "So, uh, which parts of the script did you want to go over first?" he asked.

Kieran took his place on the opposite couch, placing the script on the table between them, crossing his legs to get comfortable, "Well, let me start off with saying the overall concept of the show being a reality show wasn't bad at all. It was just the bullshit you've written around that."

"And you plan on getting around that by doing what exactly?"

"Simple! We're going to revise the scripts for the characters in order to make sure they've still got that cutting edge, but at least make sense and are relevant to the plot."

The Jew Producer looked at Kieran in question, "Didn't I already do that?"

Kieran stared at the cameraman as if to get the feeling that what he had just said was a joke, "No. No you didn't. Nearly 70% of this script is about sex and the rest is just cursing and controversial humor placed into a humungous piece of shit you'd expect to find at a zoo in the elephant cage."

"Well, fuck you," the Jew Producer scoffed as he flipped the teenager off, "That script is great regardless of what you and that crusty bitch say."

He went over to the kitchen, leaving Kieran shell-shocked and insulted. He made himself a martini, taking his time as he did so. As he finished, he made his way back to the couch, but he was swiftly kicked in the stomach by Kieran, who then snatched the glass hastily and threw it behind him.

Kieran grabbed the Jew Producer's tie and brought him forward, "You're not drinking while we're working, got that understood."

"Shut up, you don't tell me when not to drink."

"As I share the position of creator and chief writer with you, I think you'll find, sir, that I bloody well can."

"Just watch me."

"Indeed I shall." Kieran crossed his legs in triumph, as the Jew Producer dropped himself on the same couch, "Now. Back to these plans."

"Fine. What else could we add or remove?" The Jew Producer turned around to face the script.

"If I'm honest, I'm not necessarily bugged all too much about your characters. Give it time, and a few episodes should we be lucky to get that, and they'll develop into characters the audience can love, and possibly even relate to. But…"

"But what?"

Kieran chuckled, "I feel like it may be a good idea to add more characters from currently existing shows. That way, the show doesn't totally alienate people from the concept and provides some familiarity."

The Jew Producer pondered, "Hmm…I can't see any immediate harm in that."

Kieran scoffed, "Of course not!" Taking out a pen, he wrote suggestions and ideas over the script. After writing over a few pages, he got up and started to leave, "This has turned out to be quite productive, even if it wasn't that long due to behavior, not that I'm pointing fingers…"

The Jew Producer huffed in anger.

"O…K." Kieran turned back and awkwardly sighed, "Well, I've got the perfect characters in mind to add for the show, and I think it's best I write them letters first. You know, so we don't sound too demanding and stuff." He then proceeded to write the basic idea for the letter:

**_Hi there, !_**

**_May we first say 'Congratulations!', for you are lucky enough to star in our new reality show 'Toons Together'. You will be heading off to your new home in Toon Central, where will live out your lives as you would normally do while doing so in front of millions of cameras scattered around the house and the city._**

**_Hope you'll love it here!_**

**_Kieran &amp; Jew Producer, 'Toons Together' Co-creators_**

"Who've you got planned?" the Jew Producer asked as he looked over the teen's shoulder to view the

Kieran placed a finger to his lips, "You'll get to find out soon enough. I want to surprise you with this!"

The Jew Producer approached Kieran and grabbed his shoulders, "Tell me now, dammit!"

"Ugh," Kieran huffed, "It's just a couple characters from shows like Simpsons and South Park, no big deal." He slipped out of his companion's grip and sauntered to the front door, "Gotta photocopy the letter and send 'em all out to everybody! Thank God the mail service is fast here!"

The Jew Producer sighed, "Oy, what's Krabs got me into?"

* * *

Kieran restlessly made his way to the TV station to report to work. He had been up all night seeing to the letters as well as being so hyped about the idea of working on the show. The Jew Producer was a little hard to work with, which is why he had decided to deal with the letters himself, but give him time and he'd surely make the Producer see the right way to do this. In order to ensure the plans were secure, he had also submitted them to Krabs, who luckily approved.

"Mornin', Officer Nancy!" the teen greeted the security guard standing at the door.

"Hey, Kieran, how's it goin'?" the guard greeted back.

"Eh, not too bad. Managed to get most of the things sorted." He chuckled, "What about you? Catch anyone lately?"

Nancy sighed, "No. This job sucks sometimes! I can't believe they still need guards because Krabs is too cheap to pay for better security. And on top of that he doesn't even pay me what he should. He gives all the money to people who work on and star in the shows but not to the people who save his ass on a regular basis!"

Kieran nodded, "That's a little rough, I agree." He then thought of an idea, "Hey, you know, we're kinda short on security over on the show, and given I'm working with someone like the Jew Producers and his abominations of characters, why not help me out here?" he then smiled more convincingly, "I could even place you in the show as an on-screen guard for a few of the episodes. You'll be paid for sure then, and I'll make sure that happens!"

Nancy squealed with delight, "Yes! I'm in!"

The moment of happiness was disrupted as two thug fish guards exited the building with the Jew Producer in tow.

"The fuck?" the cameraman cried, "Get off of me!" he was ignored, and instead kicked up the rear, sending him flying far away from the building.

Mr. Krabs arrived and raised a fist, "And stay out!" he yelled after him.

Kieran tapped his boss on the shoulder, "Uh, sir? What's going on?"

Krabs sighed, "I've fired the Jew Producer."

"What? Why?"

Krabs fumed up, "He had the cheek to try to threaten to kill me with a knife in hand if I didn't get rid of you. He went on about how you were ruining it for him and stuff like that."

The teen shrugged, "I did try to intimidate him as he wasn't easy to work with, but I didn't know he'd taken it that hard."

Krabs pur his claws on the boy's shoulders, "Well, now you've got the show to yourself to handle. Your ideas are pretty great so far, so let's make it work!"

"Aye aye, Mr. Krabs!" Kieran happily saluted with a smile.

"Please, call me Eugene. Something tells me this show's gonna make me a record breaking profit!"

* * *

_I've extended it and added a few new details, as well as getting rid of the other characters making separate appearances as they weren't relevant not important at this point in the series._

_Hope ya liked it!_


End file.
